I identified a lot with you, I study history and art history and French too but sometimes I have trouble organizing myself and choosing what I'm going to study so as not to confuse my brain, you know. Do you have, like, an agenda?
yes, i’m a bit obsessed with organization so i have a planner and a bullet journal where i plan absolutely everything, including my studies! it’s very helpful. plus, i use chatgpt to build me my weekly schedule for what i should study during the week!
This made me realise that I did not suck at maths despite all my efforts in it. My brain just couldn't process it and i shouldn't have blamed myself for it omg
I have had the same issue as you a couple of years ago, I had started to hate studying because no matter how well I performed, I didn't get the approval I was seeking at home (in part because my performance was inconsistent and my home life was anything but stable), so I stopped trying altogether! I can tell you, it can be a journey to find back into it. The beginning may be rocky, it may not initally and immediately feel the same way it used to, but give it time and it will get better! I have now almost complete my first bachelor's degree and am now going for a second bachelor's before starting my master's! In the beginning, when I got back into studying what I was actually interested in instead of forcing myself to learn things that would get me recognition, I felt like I had hit a wall; suddenly, something that came easy felt difficult. But I gave it time, I transformed my focus, and now it is my biggest joy! I am so glad I found my way back in, even though it is in a much different way than what it used to be.
This post makes me think of the Growth Mindset by Carol S Dweck so much. To be good at learning you need to love the process of learning, but having either an external or internal voice telling you negative statements about your capabilities for learning can change your relationship with learning. It can make you hate learning because what is the point if you aren't any good? But learning isn't about being good or bad, smart or dumb, learning is about improving and evolving. Anyone can learn anything if they have a healthy relationship with the process of learning.
I love this so much. Our school system is messed up. All the most successful people excel in a certain area, yet we're expected to be average in every area. I hate it.
Hey! I really resonate with this, though my life is much different. I don't know if I'm dyscalculic, but for sure I was never praised for my mathematical abilities. Guess what? I'm doing a physics degree, and I want to focus on the purely mathematical field of physics. Is it hard? Yes, but my professors are always there to help me. I chose these subjects because they're the only ones I'm not naturally good at, but they tickle my brain like nothing else does, especially the most abstract (basically numberless) topics. The funniest thing is that one of the most esteemed professors in my department got diagnosed with dyascalculia as an adult, after a whole career as a mathematical physicist! This for me is proof of how a supportive environment can totally change your life, and unfortunately for many people like us the education system fails us completely.
I GENUINELY HAD NO CLUE ABOUT '*for some degrees you can choose to study on your own and then take a test to get it!' forever greatful for the day i downloaded substack and you writing this !! thank youuu, i hope everything goes well for you :)
Oh my gosh!! I also have dyscalculia and had the same school experience. I'm studying for my GED right now though. We are very similar!! I also enjoy learning on my own. Good luck on your studies!!
I'm glad I found this essay, you've described my struggles as an undiagnosed kid with AuDHD growing up almost perfectly. I was the smartest but also struggled with specific topics in math at some point. And slowly but surely, skill regression began hitting me and I started failing in many things, by highschool I was failing almost every class.
Yet, I always found something outside of school subjects that I was very interested in learning about. I, too, dropped everything when I fell into depression. Came out of it and after a long while of stagnant days I discovered this wonderful app and now I find myself with a little flame of passion once again.
I'm currently in a nursing degree which I don't know if I will continue to pursue or if I will make it to graduation. But my passion for learning new things has me trying to put a syllabus together for my learning journey! Most I found, contains a lot of topics leaning towards health but also the wonderous world of history, philosophy, mythology, and psychology, etc.
I would love you see your journey and also experience my personal journey while witnessing yours as well! ❤️
I resonate with this on a soul level. I graduated from college last year and I struggled so much with my studies due to my weak cognitive processing skills. But ever since I've built them up, and learning has become more about understanding than memorizing, it's opened up whole new worlds for me. I know now that with this new skill I can sit down and design my own curriculum or take a class on coursera or something and learn the material on whatever I want. I'm currently in school right now pursuing a career in healthcare, but if I had the free time, I would be studying cosmology, astrology, language (Spanish), and film
This is me right now, nobody told me I’m dumb for not knowing how to do maths, or they did, I don’t remember, the thing is, I get your message. It’s horrible being compared to other people just because they can do maths, but this made me think and realize that I’m really smart, and maths are not everything. I also fell into depression in some stage of my life and that was a thing that ruined my life in some way; because for a long time I thought that my intellect was gone just for my depression, but I also learned a language is not my native while being depressed. When I was struggling with depression, I thought that intelligence I had just disappeared one day, but I was only depressed and my life was falling apart, so I couldn’t really do anything. I hate school at this moment, but I’m trying to pursue knowledge and trying to improve my life on this aspect. I hope people understand that we can’t just be smart at maths, physics, chemistry or biology, that there is a lot of things we can also do.
Thanks for sharing this, you literally changed my mind. ⭐️
I’m glad you are at where you are now. I briefly tutored a wonderful woman who went back to get a degree in her 70s!! In electrical engineering who had dyscalculia and I think of her often, wish her the best.
My own recent journey has been making my own reading lists to delve into topics deeper, latest was food writing and restaurant culture in the US
I would have never guessed that English isn't your native language! You have a great voice that shines through your writing. Best of luck in your studies!!
This felt so relatable to me. Recently I also went through depression after finishing a degree and struggling with work, I just felt like this couldn’t be it… like I wanted more and I wanted to feel passionate about more things. After starting to get better, I realized - more like I remembered- how much I loved learning… knowing things just for the sake of knowing and wanting to understand something. That also gave me some freedom of pursuing information even if it was unrelated to my degree. Currently I’m passionate about writing again (I had stopped), psychology commentary on books and tv shows, and languages.
I identified a lot with you, I study history and art history and French too but sometimes I have trouble organizing myself and choosing what I'm going to study so as not to confuse my brain, you know. Do you have, like, an agenda?
yes, i’m a bit obsessed with organization so i have a planner and a bullet journal where i plan absolutely everything, including my studies! it’s very helpful. plus, i use chatgpt to build me my weekly schedule for what i should study during the week!
This made me realise that I did not suck at maths despite all my efforts in it. My brain just couldn't process it and i shouldn't have blamed myself for it omg
I have had the same issue as you a couple of years ago, I had started to hate studying because no matter how well I performed, I didn't get the approval I was seeking at home (in part because my performance was inconsistent and my home life was anything but stable), so I stopped trying altogether! I can tell you, it can be a journey to find back into it. The beginning may be rocky, it may not initally and immediately feel the same way it used to, but give it time and it will get better! I have now almost complete my first bachelor's degree and am now going for a second bachelor's before starting my master's! In the beginning, when I got back into studying what I was actually interested in instead of forcing myself to learn things that would get me recognition, I felt like I had hit a wall; suddenly, something that came easy felt difficult. But I gave it time, I transformed my focus, and now it is my biggest joy! I am so glad I found my way back in, even though it is in a much different way than what it used to be.
that’s awesome, congratulations!!
thank you so much, i wish you all the best and don't forget to be kind to yourself on your learning journey!
This post makes me think of the Growth Mindset by Carol S Dweck so much. To be good at learning you need to love the process of learning, but having either an external or internal voice telling you negative statements about your capabilities for learning can change your relationship with learning. It can make you hate learning because what is the point if you aren't any good? But learning isn't about being good or bad, smart or dumb, learning is about improving and evolving. Anyone can learn anything if they have a healthy relationship with the process of learning.
I love this so much. Our school system is messed up. All the most successful people excel in a certain area, yet we're expected to be average in every area. I hate it.
Hey! I really resonate with this, though my life is much different. I don't know if I'm dyscalculic, but for sure I was never praised for my mathematical abilities. Guess what? I'm doing a physics degree, and I want to focus on the purely mathematical field of physics. Is it hard? Yes, but my professors are always there to help me. I chose these subjects because they're the only ones I'm not naturally good at, but they tickle my brain like nothing else does, especially the most abstract (basically numberless) topics. The funniest thing is that one of the most esteemed professors in my department got diagnosed with dyascalculia as an adult, after a whole career as a mathematical physicist! This for me is proof of how a supportive environment can totally change your life, and unfortunately for many people like us the education system fails us completely.
thank you for sharing it❤️
I GENUINELY HAD NO CLUE ABOUT '*for some degrees you can choose to study on your own and then take a test to get it!' forever greatful for the day i downloaded substack and you writing this !! thank youuu, i hope everything goes well for you :)
Oh my gosh!! I also have dyscalculia and had the same school experience. I'm studying for my GED right now though. We are very similar!! I also enjoy learning on my own. Good luck on your studies!!
love this for u <\3
I'm glad I found this essay, you've described my struggles as an undiagnosed kid with AuDHD growing up almost perfectly. I was the smartest but also struggled with specific topics in math at some point. And slowly but surely, skill regression began hitting me and I started failing in many things, by highschool I was failing almost every class.
Yet, I always found something outside of school subjects that I was very interested in learning about. I, too, dropped everything when I fell into depression. Came out of it and after a long while of stagnant days I discovered this wonderful app and now I find myself with a little flame of passion once again.
I'm currently in a nursing degree which I don't know if I will continue to pursue or if I will make it to graduation. But my passion for learning new things has me trying to put a syllabus together for my learning journey! Most I found, contains a lot of topics leaning towards health but also the wonderous world of history, philosophy, mythology, and psychology, etc.
I would love you see your journey and also experience my personal journey while witnessing yours as well! ❤️
I resonate with this on a soul level. I graduated from college last year and I struggled so much with my studies due to my weak cognitive processing skills. But ever since I've built them up, and learning has become more about understanding than memorizing, it's opened up whole new worlds for me. I know now that with this new skill I can sit down and design my own curriculum or take a class on coursera or something and learn the material on whatever I want. I'm currently in school right now pursuing a career in healthcare, but if I had the free time, I would be studying cosmology, astrology, language (Spanish), and film
This is me right now, nobody told me I’m dumb for not knowing how to do maths, or they did, I don’t remember, the thing is, I get your message. It’s horrible being compared to other people just because they can do maths, but this made me think and realize that I’m really smart, and maths are not everything. I also fell into depression in some stage of my life and that was a thing that ruined my life in some way; because for a long time I thought that my intellect was gone just for my depression, but I also learned a language is not my native while being depressed. When I was struggling with depression, I thought that intelligence I had just disappeared one day, but I was only depressed and my life was falling apart, so I couldn’t really do anything. I hate school at this moment, but I’m trying to pursue knowledge and trying to improve my life on this aspect. I hope people understand that we can’t just be smart at maths, physics, chemistry or biology, that there is a lot of things we can also do.
Thanks for sharing this, you literally changed my mind. ⭐️
I’m glad you are at where you are now. I briefly tutored a wonderful woman who went back to get a degree in her 70s!! In electrical engineering who had dyscalculia and I think of her often, wish her the best.
My own recent journey has been making my own reading lists to delve into topics deeper, latest was food writing and restaurant culture in the US
I would have never guessed that English isn't your native language! You have a great voice that shines through your writing. Best of luck in your studies!!
that’s the best compliment! thank you 🥰
This felt so relatable to me. Recently I also went through depression after finishing a degree and struggling with work, I just felt like this couldn’t be it… like I wanted more and I wanted to feel passionate about more things. After starting to get better, I realized - more like I remembered- how much I loved learning… knowing things just for the sake of knowing and wanting to understand something. That also gave me some freedom of pursuing information even if it was unrelated to my degree. Currently I’m passionate about writing again (I had stopped), psychology commentary on books and tv shows, and languages.